Nightmares about ex fiance' is very painful, how do you get them to stop?

I had lived with my ex finace' and it was a very difficult time for me. He is a major multi -millionare and and is very use to getting his way. He supported me while we moved somewhere warm for the winter so I wouldnt have to work and it was his idea, I am a business woman and had a good job I didnt like at the time so I decided what the heck. When he got to our destination he expressed he expected me to be a housewife and he has never done a load of laundry in his life; had I known that we would have talked ahead of time and probably wouldnt have agreed. I did not realize this was going to be my role, not that there is anything wrong with being a housewife I just never have had experience and I was thrown into the fire; until I got to our destination and he was complaining that I was not cooking and cleaning enough for him. I really tried.





I had Hep ';c'; and he demanded I get it treated because it was making me lethargic and I couldn't do enough; he basically was abusive about it. The good thing is I got it treated, but he left me in the beginning of the treatments because he thought that I did not do enough for the relationship and didn't tell him how great he is all the time. He was abusive and never apologized for anything; gave me 30 rules to follow and told me unless I shaped up he was leaving. We were engaged and he would say, once this would happen or that; I would be a keeper. I guess I didn't shape up and it was very stressful for me. I started to really dislike him and gave him back his very expensive ring.





The minute it ended he met someone else and basically couldn't have cared less about me; this is after him telling me how much he loved me, went to counseling, blah, blah, blah the week earlier. He literally told me he was over it within no time and didn't love me anymore and hadn't for months; it was very cold. He has been insanely cold, however, I don't think he is doing to hurt me which is worse because I really think he just doesn't think about our ending an engagment, me and he is on to the next. This, however, was very embarrassing and hurtful for me to end an announced engagement and realize he couldn't care less really; it feels like a met the master manipulator with no real soul. I am not a doctor, but I suspect he is a full blown narcissist.





I have these reoccuring nightmares where I interact with him and he just couldn't care less; I wake up anxious, upset and really nervous. I do not know how to stop them and why I keep having them; we have been broken up for 6 months. We have had some interactions over money that have been very abusive and are ending really soon, for the last 5 months I report to him like he is the unemployment office while looking for a job. He just humilates me and I keep having dreams about it??? It is driving me crazy and want them to stop, it is like reliving it every time! How can you get dreams to stop; it is very painful and scarey every time!Nightmares about ex fiance' is very painful, how do you get them to stop?
You need psychiatric intervention and maybe some medication.Nightmares about ex fiance' is very painful, how do you get them to stop?
Benzodiazepines like Xanax and Klonopin help prevent nightmares and relieve anxiety. Ask your doctor to put you on one.
Hire a hypnotist, I will do it.
Hi Katherine. I am going to give you one of those answers everyone seems to hate but here goes. I used to be an atheist and now am more agnostic. I would like to consider myself a religion some day maybe Christian but right now I can just say for sure I believe in a higher power up above.





What I do is for a full 10 minutes before falling asleep I pray out loud. I pray thanking for all the good things in my life. Then I pray to forgive people if I need to. Periodically during the day when I read a news story about a child being hurt, or someone being wronged, I close my eyes for a few seconds and say a quick prayer for them and their family.





I know this sounds wierd to some people and I am not going to tell you its God doing it, it could be psychological, but I sleep much much better.





You may also need to find a way to make yourself feel good or safe. Its not really the same thing, its apples and oranges, but I purchase my first shotgun a while back and I keep it under my bed. I make sure the gun is loaded and ready to go, just in case my prayers aren't answered then the gun is there if anyone breaks in or my whole family gets murdered in the night or anything crazy.





You are doing the right thing trying to get help with this. This morning when I woke up I thought about something that bothers me for a split second. This thing bothered me so much that I thought about it every day and even in my dreams. Whenever the thing pops into my head, I first picture a red stop sign that says ';NO';, then I whisper ';shut up'; to myself, then I picture a hand waving its finger back and forth like na uh uh type thing. It sounds silly but I would rather think of this a couple of times a day (it seems to get less and less as time goes on) than think about the thing that bothered me. You will get better just keep trying.
well i get rid of nightmares by dosing up on Ambien. double doses put me under in a dreamless sleep. Serequel also works extremely well.


talk to your doc about them
easy- you quit having interactions with him. because you continue to have interactions with him you are continuing to keep him in your subconscious.





you guys weren't married so there's no reason for you to be going to him for money anyway. you were independent before you met him, time to be that way again.
You have control over your own dreams, just like you have control over your own life. If you don't have either, then it is way past time to get both. So do so. Who cares if he is rich? Find your own damn money, and never see him again is the first step. Even if you have no money, I'd rather be homeless than mooching off of someone who I used to love, that manipulated the crap out of me like that. Not that I would ever stand for being manipulated like that. No amount of riches is worth having to put up with an ego that out of control and manipulative. Power corrupts, and he is obviously a lost cause. You need to do something called the recapitulation. It's an ancient Toltec secret. Look it up online. Then do it. That will stop the dreams.
Abuse is very traumatic. Many victims of abuse experience Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, and nightmares can be part of that. I don't know if this is what you are experiencing, but it's a possibility.





You mention that you have the dreams after you interact with him; a rational question would be why do you continue to interact with him? My first suggestion would be to STOP SEEING HIM.





The behavior you mention follows the pattern of an abuser. He got you isolated, then he tried to destroy you. Consider yourself so lucky that he dumped you. It sounds like you were willing to take it.





For free counseling, call 800.799.SAFE.
Put aside your unbelief and Say this prayer so God can come into your life, He is right there waiting, hoping You will make this choice %26amp; say it.


He has a plan for your life He can and will help you with everything. He wants you to be the best you can be. He loves you and gave You free will to choose having His unfailing love in your life or not He loved you first and left the door open for you. Its up to you to walk through into His loving arms.


God can help you, If only you ask Him.


If you want to accept Christ as Savior and turn from your sins, you can ask Him to be your Savior and Lord by praying a prayer like this:


';Lord Jesus, I believe You are the Son of God. Thank You for dying on the cross for my sins. Please forgive my sins and give me the gift of eternal life. I ask You in to my life and heart to be my Lord and Savior. I want to serve You always.'; Amen


He helped me and I want you to feel his Love too.


Then pass on this prayer to others so they can get to know Gods unfailing love too!
If you have experienced trauma then, unless your brain is totally blocking the ordeal, you will work through solutions to the problems you experienced in dreams. It is your mind's way to try to make sense of the experience and of your emotions.





If you want to settle your mind before sleep try saying the following before going to bed: I will not dream of puppies, I will not dream of puppies, I will not dream of puppies.





Then, when you have had a good night's sleep deal with you emotions by talking to someone who is supportive.





I contacted someone when I was having a similar problem to yours. My abusive boyfriend just kept visiting me in my sleep. When I asked someone about it they said, ';Dreams are the mind's way of getting rid of trash';. ; ) I liked that answer. It helped me.





Pleasant dreams.
well they say nightmares are the stuff you fear the most.





It seems to me that only when ALL interactions with him stop then you can think of getting over these dreams.





I know what it's like to be in such a manipulative relationship..and the only thing that helped me stop feeling humiliated and allow me to not care if he cares or not, was distancing myself and getting occupied in other things.





Maybe make some new frinds, date, put it out of your mind.





Also try to get you hands on this e-book ';Who's Pulling Your Strings?- How to break the cycle of Manipulation and Regain control of your life.'; By Harriet B. Braiker.





It will help you to get over him and show you how to make better decisions to have more control of your life.





When you begin to feel once more, that you have control of your life, I think these dreams will go away.
This is probably where you need to see a sleep doctor. When ever you have dreams like this it normally means that your having some sort of issues that when you conscious you don't realize you have them. I'm not a dream expert so I have NO idea how to handle situations like this but I have heard that sleep doctors can help you out.