How do you suggest I deal with this?

I am 14 years old and I am going through a bit of a rough patch in my life. Here is my story if you are willing to listen. I first moved from Pittsburgh to NEPA because of my father's job. Everything was great and my family was happy. Well, I thought so at least. I had friends and a house to live in. I lived there for about two years and was fine. My parents then came out to me and my two other brothers and said they were getting a divorce. I accepted it as something I couldnt change and moved on with my life. Then about two months later my father did something unexpected. He killed himself with a gun after mixing his anti- depressants with alcohol (R.I.P 10/8/2008) So after that we moved about ten minutes away from where we used to live and closer to all of my friends and I loved it. My mom started dating a man named Dave about two months after my father's death. She would go to Dave's house every weekend and leave us home alone, which gave my brother enough freedom to become addicted to drugs (he never was the smartest of the bunch). We went to counseling and I liked it a bit. Then my brother got in trouble with drugs and guns and led to his arrest. He has to go to court. My mom made us move again to a place thirty minutes from my house and closer to her beloved Dave. But she blames the move on her work and my brother. I still sleep at my old house in the basement on a pillow that I have. I have my xbox and internet and that's all I need to be happy. I hang out with friends a lot and now that I am moving I will barely ever see them because my mom will always be at Dave's. Now I sit here writing this to you wondering where that warm comfort I once had has gone. I just want to be happy and warm. And the only way I feel even a bit of happiness is if I think to past times that made me happy. I am turning to complete strangers for this because my mom is a narcissist my brothers are dumb asses and the rest of my family will single me out if I talk to them. Please, I just want to be happy.


Thank you,


LucasHow do you suggest I deal with this?
Well you have gone through hell in the past couple of years! At your age you are pretty much at the mercy of your mother, which sucks. Your brother is making terrible choices probably as a result of all the stuff you guys have gone through recently. It is very hard for an adult to deal with a loved ones suicide but I think it is even harder for kids to understand. If you are angry with your dad let me tell you that anger is a normal healthy feeling to have when someone commits suicide. Many times when someone feels angry with someone they loved that died they feel guilty. If you are angry with your dad don't feel guilty about it. You have every right to be angry! It doesn't seem like your mom is really there for you as she should be. You may want to sit her down and explain to her how miserable you feel right now. Tell her that you would like to go back to family counseling to see if you can work things out. If she doesn't want to go to family counseling ask her if she can take you to a counselor then. You do need someone to talk to about everything you are going through and have gone through in the past couple of years. You can message me if you would like. I have lost many people in my life including my dad and two of my children so I understand grief. I also understand divorce and what teens go through. Take care of yourself and know that things will get better for you.How do you suggest I deal with this?
Listen, life is not a bed of roses for anyone, sure


you have more bumps than normal. Make yourself


a strong person by picking your head up high and making


the decision to not let this turn you into a drug addict!


Addicts are weak people that need a crutch. Stick it out,


toughen up, do well in school and make something of yourself!


Show people that you don't need that crutch and learn to deal


with lifes journey's! Good Luck


Try going to local YMCA, gym, etc and turning your frustrations out


on something that will make you a better person.
OGod honey i was reading your story, expecting a divorce and then you said your father killed himself. I actually physically jumped. I am so sorry, sometimes I don't know how we are supposed to deal with what life hands us. Jesus, I feel so bad for you. I have no advice. Your situation just makes me sag, God knows what it does to you. Honey I am sorry. I just don't have any little helpful hints for this magnitude. Please accept my sympathy, and just know people feel for you.