Monday, August 16, 2010

Lost the love of my life, in a new relationship and can't stop comparing the two I feel stuck now because.....

because i have 3 children my true love and i were married to young and now i have tried to find him after 9 years to let him know how i feel i can't imagine ever getting married again and the guy i am with now is so emotionally abusive and the biggest narcissist i have ever met but for some unknown reason i keep taking the BS we live together and instead of him paying our electric bill he buys himself a hotrod...don't mean to ramble just seriously questiong why i can;t leave him and why the strong desire to find my one true soulmate???? please help ...........Lost the love of my life, in a new relationship and can't stop comparing the two I feel stuck now because.....
I got in contact with a woman I love very much after about 9yrs. she ened up divorcing her husband and we were to get married, but she ended up backing out. We still love one another very much and I still see her. She is living with her ex-husband who is the father of her daughter. Now she tells me she loves me but she loves him too. I know that she is unwilling to leave her comfortable life with him and to take a chance on us. Also he uses her daughter against her. He tells her that she cannot be around me. He does this for spite, but it sure messed up our relationship. If you are going do do this you have to do it all the way there is no middle ground here.Lost the love of my life, in a new relationship and can't stop comparing the two I feel stuck now because.....
You can leave him. Stop saying I can't. Yes you can. He's


not forcing you to stay there. you need to leave him because you are unhappy. Stop going around comparing every


man you meet with your first love. If he was meant to be your first love then you two would be together right now.


you are just making yourself sick.
If you feel stuck it is because you have made yourself be stuck. It doesn't sound like the guy you are with is worth a plug nickel. Emotional abuse is no better than physical abuse. Would you stay if he hit you? Of course not. Get out.


You are idealizing your ';one true love';. He's been out of your life for nine years and now you're in a relationship with a dolt, so the ';true love'; you let go becomes ever so much more attractive.





Read this next sentence carefully and more than once - tape it to your mirror if you have to, so you can see it every day until it is fully embedded in your brain - ready - here goes:





YOU DO NOT NEED A MAN IN YOUR LIFE TO BE WHOLE, BECAUSE YOU ARE A COMPLETE, WORTHWHILE HUMAN BEING ALL ON YOUR OWN.





It shouldn't be ';man A or man B';. It should be ';my sanity or this idiot';. If Mr. Wonderful doesn't find his way back to you, then so be it. You and Mr. Wonderful lost each other half a lifetime ago. If he was your soulmate, you wouldn't be looking for him because he never would have left.





Stop living in the past, get out of this crazy relationship, and move forward with your life.
you're obviuosly not happy,get rid of this guy,he's irresponsible.you'll find your soulmate when the time comes.don't know what happened btn you and your true love,but whatever it is you can't be dwelling on the past you got to get ti together with your recent problem.resolve it first then you'll have clear mind to pursue other matters.
the first thing to do is to get out of this bad relationship u are in. then take some time for yourself and if u can, have some councelling. if your marriage didnt work out the first time, then it probably wouldnt again. maybe u are looking back on your lost love with rose tinted glasses as it seems better than the situation u are in now. there are plenty of good guys in the world so try to move on.
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